SEXTING! LiLo's Lost Phone

According to our source Lindsay Lohan came scrapingly close to being the next celebrity to fall the victim of a cell phone leak – Sexting, Naked Self Portrait via iPhone. Luckily for LiLo, the samaritan who found her phone had no interest in getting involved in all that Hollywood gossip – have to love a New Yorker. Our favorite 25-year-old starlet reportedly lost her phone while out and about in NYC for Fashion Week. LiLo apparently dropped the phone while leaving the V Magazine party. How did the finder know that it was LiLo’s phone? Apparently the phone said “Lindsay Lohan’s Phone” when the semaritan turned it on! She’s a clever girl our LiLo.  The phone doubtlessly held some incriminating photos that LiLo wouldn’t want anyone to see! Don’t worry though, there won’t be any naked pix of Lindsay hitting this here interweb anytime soon. LiLo was said to be “ecstatic” when her phone was returned. She was also relieved that the person who found it didn’t try to extort money from her or sell the photos to the tabloids. Lucky for LiLo, one of the few remaining nice people in the world did the right thing.  … the phone contained  a heap of important contacts,  phone numbers and emails, as well as personal photos and “a lot of stuff” that she wouldn’t want published. Looks as though our LiLo’s luck has finally turned!? D★D

Cicciolina: If I Could love a Woman . . .

Seems our favourite Porn Star is back in the news. Having lived through a life filled with the normal angst, politics, celebrity, porn, marriage to Jeff Koons, divorce from Jeff Koons and on and on. Cicciolina aka Anna Elena Staller aka Ilona Staller, has once again hit the headlines.

If we back up to 1987 – eew, I’m old – Staller was elected to the Italian Parliament via the Lista del Sole – Green – party, her election caused much hoopla at the time and seriously aided her show business career. Staller only served one term – 5 years – as a politician, then was promptly ditched by her constituents.

“I am available to make love to Saddam Hussein to achieve peace in the Middle East” Staller said.

During her lustrous public service she continued to raise eyebrows, offering to make love to Saddam Hussien – before the Gulf War, so ahead of her time – in the name of peace. She also offered her wonderfilled body to Osama Bin Laden if he’d stop blowing stuff up, we think he declined :: Read the full NSFW! article »»»»

Naked Therapy: Sarah White

UPDATED: Just like a the plot of a soft porn flick, she plays up to overtly specific fantasies, soft soft spoken words of assurance and a sigh that subtly follows heart felt words. You might think this is pure fiction. In this Internet sourced world of nothing being real this one is so so real. As The Naked Therapist - now known as Sarah White Therapy – Sarah  White offers one on one therapy sessions while she slowly strips till she’s in the buff. The whole session is conducted via web cam and while she’s is based in New York her service is available to everyone with a broadband connection. White has also extended her practice to include 3 new team members, Penelop Wolfe (left)  Randy Hastings (Center)  and Carli Moore (right)

At around $200 a session (1 hour) White describes her therapy as “. . .a form of talk therapy in which the therapist and/or the patient get naked in an environment in which arousal – physical, emotional and intellectual – is encouraged and utilized to arrive at unique self-discoveries. Read the full article »»»»

NSFW! Scarlett Johansson

Unfortunately it’s a dubious proposition, Johansson has a new movie out early next year, the much hyped Avengers. She’s also been a little quiet on the PR trail of late?

Regardless, the interweb is once more abuzz with naked private pictures of a celebrity. When are these people going to learn, it’s inappropriate to take naked snaps? If what you desire is a lily-white reputation, to be able to set a solid moral example for your younger more impressionable fans – DON’T TAKE THE HAPPY SNAPS!  it seems Ms Johansson has called in the FBI to track down those nasty phone hackers.

An FBI spokesman declined to confirm or deny any investigation was underway, and a representative for Ms Johansson was not available to comment.

Ms Johansson has apparently turned to her attorney Marty Singer to do the dirty work of making sure everybody in the world pulls down the dirty pix. Ms Johansson’s lawyer has made it clear that his client wants every website which has posted the pics to take them down immediately :: Read the full NSFW! article »»»»

Funkinwagnill: Fact # 000003

TAGS TAGS TAGS! The internet is run on the darn things, they assist in pointing your browser to relevant content. TAGS or keywords are intended to be overtly literal, for example: Facebook/facebook will clearly bring up search results relvant to Facebook/facebook! Based on Google’s clever search algorithm NOT PORN will list a bunch of sites that are not pornographic?! Wikipedia describe PORN as: “the portrayal of explicit sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual arousal and erotic satisfaction.“ It stands to reason then that NOT PORN is NOT the portrayal of explicit sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual arousal and erotic satisfaction. This is relevant to us for several reasons.

Google has requested that our TAG: NOT PORN be removed from our Stepanie Seymour Articles: www.sociallyengineered.com.au/Stephanie+Seymour/ claiming the articles are pornographic?

Google has suspended our Adsense account due to the Tag: NOT PORN

At NO TIME has or will www.highpants.com posted PORNOGRAPHIC MATERIAL, as the TAG suggests NOT PORN is not porn.

PORNOGRAPHIC material in our view is blatant, unmistakeable: when you see it you know it!

www.highpants is not claiming that it is angelic, nor are we remotely interested in skewed morals, our point of view is that of the broader community.
Other TAGS that may offend are Shut The F_ck Up, Naked and Nude, Bipolar Blond Moment, infact almost any combination of words has the potential to offend.

We are not bound by any Google page rating system, nor do we recognise Google as a net nanny, we rely on www.ncmec.org  and the like.
We are rated <R> and our sites are suitable for adults 18 years and older.

If you are offended by any of our content – such as NOT PORN – please do not revisit our site, close this page and don’t return!

REMINDER! you are here voluntarily, if your children stroll onto this site, please control them.

A Reminder: Pornography or porn is the portrayal of explicit sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual arousal and erotic satisfaction, we don’t run porn, we could care-less about your sexual arousal, we love you for your minds!  NOT PORN is a literal TAG: it is not porn.

Shut the F_ck up: Kim Kardashian, Jam Video Leaked?!

Ok now we’re pissed! The Hollywood PR machine has now taken over the galaxy. The regular fools that run with FAKE LEAKS are all lined up – no surprise – on this one. Add into that rag-tag bunch of no-hope journalists a couple of wannabe trash-glam bloggers like Perez – you should know f_cking better – Hilton and a couple of other hopeless fools  . . . . and what do you have, NOT MUCH

Ok Ok, I hear you! WTF is this RANT about?  Well I’m ever so pleased you asked!  KIM KARDASIAN

Apparently the well rounded nightmare has a new video clip out – which is clearly a problem – but not the crux of this gripe + moan. The gripe is the manner in which the talentless darling launched her noise into the galaxy. News sites, Music sites and gossip mongers all chipped in to sell us all a headline “Leaked New Kim Kardasion Music Clip” Seriously are we this thick!! Mainstream, supposedly professional journalists publishing what is simply Hollywood hipe. Lets not get sideways on this, we love Hollywood Hipe! It is what it is, hipe, and has no place in media being presented as news or faux gossip! To those journos and editors that published this trash  . . . and you wonder why your industry is shrinking from under you?!

The Mail Online headline  “The OTHER video Kim Kardashian didn’t want you to see: Racy music clip for failed single leaked online”  Not even close to a racy music clip,  It’s a 55 second teaser! Read the full article »»»»